Almost 4 Hollywood marriages and the need for more grace in our lives

It's nearing the end of September. Our summer like weather is soon ending. I told Miss K this morning that today may be the last day for shorts to school. She was bummed. I can't say as I blame her.

I am not in a position to wear shorts to the day job, however it is almost sublime to be able to come home the end of September and slip into a pair of shorts and walk around barefoot as the temperature is still nice enough to be able to do so.

Fall is nice don't get me wrong but it's not summer.

Tomorrow is anniversary number 8, which in today's society is about 4 Hollywood marriages. This time last year I was not even sure that we'd make 8 years. Things were weird, still are in some ways.

When your husband makes the statement that he is not in love with you anymore…your world turns upside down. A year later, I'm standing on my feet again, but balancing a lot of things and emotions still.

I do have faith we'll make 9 years and probably more. Things are better. There was no fighting or great conflict. I felt and still feel some days that Big C is troubled and though we talk about everything under the sun, this "stuff" is something he can't share with me.

It's troubling. But the footing underneath is more solid and I look at it as we can only go forward, we cannot go back to the past. 

I'm speaking up more. If only to say what I feel. Maybe not as much as I should, but I'm getting it out there a bit more.

It's not that I feel that either of us needs to change. Just that things need to be more out in the open. If I do so, then perhaps he will too.

Oddly it seems like this is another transition time in our lives. Not in an outward sense as we are both secure in our jobs, loving our house, Miss K is rocking the school thing and so on but in a more intangible sense.

I see old friendships changing or fading away and new ones forming. Activities once a regular thing taking the back seat to new experiences and opportunities.

You change, you roll with the punches, you adapt all while trying to keep your values, integrity and be grateful for the chances that you do have.

I think that is a big one for me right now. Gratitude. Or people's lack of it.

So much taken for granted, so much sense of entitlement and it can all be gone in an instant.

It's taking the time to ask someone how they are doing, or remembering an important event in their life.  Doing something for someone to show that you care. (I put completing school lunches and making your husband's lunch in this category only because I hate it so much). 

You don't have to go out of your way or spend a ton of money. Sometimes even the impersonal text message can be helpful when used in the appropriate way.

If someone gives you something or does something for you, say thanks. Please. Just say thank you. If your kid gets a birthday card from some distant relative, let them know it was received. It does not have to be formal or fancy, but tell them their effort was appreciated. 

Don't take anything for granted. If your kid asks for the 1000th time for you to do whatever annoying thing they want to do maybe it's time to do it. 

I sat and did some play-doh with Miss K yesterday for all of about 10 minutes but she was thrilled. I hate going to the park to play, but we go once or twice a month because it means a lot to her.

I say thank you when my husband cooks breakfast or makes me a drink and I mean it. 

As the saying goes; Life is short, play hard. Maybe life cannot be all play, but nourishing those relationships you need/want in your life is important. 

I can't stand that the house doesn't get cleaned on a regular basis, hate that there is more on the to-do list than the has been done list. However, I'm never going to regret a good water fight with my kid, or helping my husband out. 

Sometimes those opportunities get shoved to the side. Or we miss the chance to appreciate what others do for us. Who knows when just saying thanks could make someone's day?

I'm not an eternal optimist, more cynical and sarcastic, but I do believe there is good in the world and that we have to be cognizant of our surroundings and not miss out on the beauty of the world as well as the people in it.

If someone or something is not making your world a better place to be, then perhaps its time to move on to those that do.

Til next time…be gracious in all things you do, you may need some grace in your life when you least expect it

Things that can make you sad

We're past the mid way point of September and that makes me sad.

My barefoot days are coming to an end shortly. The seasons are going to change and I'm going to have to wear socks all the time. It makes me sad. Fall is lovely, but cold feet are not. There are lots of nice days in fall, but usually not warm enough in these parts to walk about barefoot and that is sad.

Big C's birthday is today, but he is not home with us and that is sad. He is with is dad doing some hunting and fishing so I suppose that is a good way to spend your birthday so for that I am grateful.

There is the Syrian refugee crisis and that is sad. I don't really understand all of it, but to want to pack up your family and leave a country locked in permanent unrest is a horrible thought. I feel sad for those people, and am not sad that I live in a country that people would like to come to in times of war/unrest/turmoil. 

It is sad that all of them cannot be helped. You try your best and look out for your fellow human being but in the end how much do you really want to give? You're still going to make sure your family is fed and taken care of and you're never really sure if your money gets to any of them anyway and that is sad.

The little boy in Texas who made a clock and took it into his high school got arrested because the teacher thought it was a bomb. While I understand the need for caution, at the grade 9 level both student and faculty should be capable enough to explain the situation so that no one gets arrested. It makes me sad that our society is so "on edge" that a kid cannot experiment with anything any more.

The argument is there that if a kid makes a toy gun should you not be suspicious that its a real gun? It was a clock people! A clock for goodness sake. I could have made a teddy bear for home economics and put a bomb inside that, but would my teacher be suspicious, no probably not as it was so cute and fluffy. When will common sense prevail again? It make me sad to think this kid will probably never bring anything into school again, nor will his classmates, lest someone think it a bomb.

Closer to home we had an amber alert this week for a missing 2 year old. I had to explain to Miss K what an amber alert was. She thought it was a good idea, but would definitely be scary not to know where your mom and dad were, or to be taken away by someone.

Sadder still the little girl was killed. Her dad killed and her as well. Awful. No 2 year old should be killed because someone had a beef with their dad. How does the mom ever go on with life?

Then there are the other things in the news that make me sad. Like why the Kardashian's even get media coverage? Who cares what sexual orientation Miley Cyrus is? The list goes on and on, but I guess we as a culture fuel this media circus and that is sad in itself.

It's Friday today and that is not sad…so til next time ignore the things in the world that are sad and make someone happy...

Where did summer go?

It has been freaking forever since I did a post here. For-ever with a capital F. WTF? 

I have no idea what has been going on that I've not been posting. I've been reading lots of blogs but not writing in mine.

Maybe a combo of nothing to say and no time to say nothing…if that even makes sense?

Back to school has been accomplished, we're on day 4 and I'm already hating the whole process. Once we get back into the routine it will be fine I'm sure, but I really dislike forms and lunches and putting names in everything. Which by the way I fail miserably at. I never remember when Miss K gets something new that it needs to be labeled. PITA if you ask me, these kids should be smart enough to keep track of their own shit shouldn't they?

Home life is pretty mellow. We're winding down with summer which makes me infinitely sad. But Autumn is OK as a season, just it's not summer…LOL. 

The puppy dog put something through is foot the other weekend. We're not sure what but he did a good job of it. Let's just say we're winding up week 2 of antibiotics and only recently has he got rid of the cone of shame.

He was such a bully with that thing. Once he figured out it made him that much bigger and he could just charge through most anything it was awful. To him it was the cone of "i can go wherever I damn well please and no one can stop me". He's getting better and that is the important part, hopefully his foot has healed enough for hunting season coming up. Big C anxious to have a duck hunting buddy again this year.

So that's our life, not too exciting…just living and taking the days as they're thrown at us…and somedays they are hurled at you at dizzying speeds but you bounce, tuck and roll with it and come out on the other side

Til next time…hope back to school is going well for everyone