Monday 16 June 2014

28 stickers


She did it. Miss K got 28 stickers. A perfect week on her behaviour chart. It was  going to be tricky for her, and she nearly blew it at bed time Saturday night but she did it and got her prize.

Let's back up a bit here. Miss K is not a bad kid, far from it, she for the most part is a pretty decent individual, but we wanted to show her that hard work pays off and working on things you're not good at or need help with will reap rewards in the long run.

We have a weekly chart, each day has 4 things that she needs to work on. Listening ears, no baby talk, good manners and getting herself ready. Listening ears and getting ready being the ones she struggles with the most.

The idea is that she needs 20+ stickers on the week, or about a 3 sticker per day average to get one hour of time with one or both of us to do something special (ie: not monetary) with us. 

If she achieves this milestone, we will give her our undivided attention playing lego, or going to the park or splash pad or whatever she chooses.

She's done pretty well in the last 6 weeks with only one week that she totally blew it all and got about 17 stickers total.

But last week she was perfect. Maybe not perfect, but she earned 4 stickers every single day. 

Big C was out of town or had other commitments most of the week so it was just her and I and she was a trooper. She fed the dog every night, she helped get stuff out for supper and helped clean up things too. Lots of things above and beyond her sticker guidelines and more than adequate for someone who is not quite 4 years old.

Saturday night there was a bit of a slip, she started to get worked up at bed time. Which usually leads to a lot of crying, phantom aches and pains, numerous bathroom trips etc…but she reigned it in and gained some grace with us as she'd been pretty much stellar all week.

So she got her prize, a shopping trip with her dad to get some Lego. Nothing big or fancy, but she was delighted that she could get something for doing good stuff.

We've changed things up a bit for this week and we'll add new tasks/behaviour to the list down the road and no doubt the standards will go up or tighten but I think she's learning something from it and we're getting better behaviour overall which makes everything so much better.

Punishing her for bad behaviour didn't seem to do much, we'd all end up getting mad and feeling guilty for something we said, so we decided to go with this approach and it seems to be working.

Reward her with our time and undivided attention when she has good behaviour. Kind of like getting a raise when you do a good job, but the preschooler version.

It may not work forever, but I can see it evolving into a chore chart as she grows, the reward being her allowance, or still just time with mom and dad to do something special.

For now, I'm happy that she is striving to get the perfect number of stickers and we're enjoying a more peaceful household, and our quality time together too…

Til next time…use your listening ears more than your talking mouth….

Wednesday 11 June 2014

The passage of time and the democratic process


We're almost in the middle of June, which means Miss K turns 4 soon. Four, wow. Crazy stuff, I was watching her walk ahead of me last night and marvelled at how big she'd gotten. Tall really, not big, damn kid is still wearing 18 month shorts, but I digress.

She's become her own person, a preschooler, a being that sometimes baffles me with her growth and knowledge and other times aggravates the crap out of me.

She is a happy kid, usually brimming with a glow and energy about her that radiates and enriches those around her. I think she is genuinely missed the days that she doesn't go to her sitter. This makes me happy for her that she has such an impact on those around her in a positive way, and encourages me that we're doing a good job raising her because I really could strangle her sometimes.

I watched her sleep the other morning, she was out cold, flat on her back, mouth open, quietly snoring away and it took me back in time. She's much bigger now, but so much the same its amazing, I look at her and I'm transported to those newborn days when the sleep was so complete and deep in was magical almost.

It's my secret indulgence, I stand and watch her sleep from time to time, just soaking it all in, all the memories, the moment, everything…marvelling at the passage of time, but how some things just stay the same.

It won't be much of a party this year when she turns 4. There's no room and no time in the in between house for much entertaining, but it will be good just the same. She's healthy and happy, and we're thankful every day to have her in our lives.

Changing gears and in other news, tomorrow is election day in our province. Hoping I can get out to vote. The skeptic in me kind of wonders how much impact my one little vote is really going to make in a province with something like 10 million people, but at the same time I do feel guilty if I don't vote.

I'm not a municipal level voter, never have been and probably never will be, I don't usually know the people, I don't typically care about local politics that much. But, when it comes to provincial or federal elections I really do try to vote. 

The implications are a much greater at this level if someone gets into office that you don't really care too much for. Probably if we lived in a larger city I'd be more inclined to care about who the mayor or councillors are, but not where we are now. If we don't like it, we can just move.

Big C has never voted. Shameful for someone in his 40's really. It's our democratic right and he being employed where he is should be more concerned than most.  I'm not going to pressure him by any means, I do understand why people don't vote. 

There's a certain amount of apathy that runs through any election time. Kind of a pick the lesser of the evils out there seems the trend. Unless you are a true party supporter, you're probably like the rest of the population and tend towards one group or another, but no real set allegiance.

It's hard, when all the promises and platforms sort of sound the same, or talk of things that you know will never ever happen. 

But, it is still a vital part of our culture. I couldn't imagine living somewhere that I didn't have a choice who ran my village or country. I don't say that I like every person in power here, but at least it was my town folk, or countrymen/women that did choose.

I hope if you have the chance to vote where you live, that you do make an effort, and that you get your kids of voting age to make an effort. You don't have to do it every time, but get out there and make your voice heard, remember theres a whole lot of folks in this world who don't have the chance…

Til next time…may we not have someone smarmy in office…if you live here you know who I'm talking about

Wednesday 4 June 2014

Plugging away in the in between house


Life is not dull these days.

Is it super crazy, chaotic and stupidly busy? Maybe not, but let's just say, some days I can't remember why I am in a room more often than not. I forgot my wallet at work yesterday. It was long after I got home from work that I even realized that I didn't have my wallet, so you know how things are going.

We're as settled as we can be in our in between house. It's good for us, we're all together and we're leading as normal a life as possible.

But it's still nuts. The owners are trying to sell the property and we agreed to help do some clean up/touch up in the process of living there.

Let me be clear, we do not have the time and money that is necessary for a good clean up of this place. It isn't an awful, smelly rat hole by any means, it was relatively clean, dry and for the most part well kept.

However, the house was built in the 1960's and no major renovations other than the kitchen have taken place since then. There's a multitude of things that need to be done to make the house worth the asking price.

But we're doing our utmost to take care of some of the small cosmetic stuff. Filling holes, cleaning, painting trim, and other such appearance type items.

Luckily the realtor we used is the same one that has listed this house and she's all for our efforts to tidy things up. It would have been a pretty tough sell with how the last tenants left it.

We were up late last night doing more painting, cleaning etc…ahead of a planned open house this weekend. There's countless things to do and we can only do a portion of them. You want to help someone out, but in the same breath, it's not your place and there are so many other things that they could have done already.

We will do what we can, but our efforts will only carry things so far, the owners are going to have to make an effort too and fix some of the more major issues.

So we're working full days, trying to spend time with the kid and the fur kid, fixing up this house a bit, trying to organize stuff for the new house as well. 

We had baby bunnies in the back yard of the in between house which was very cool, but a pain to keep the puppy dog out of them. 

Big C travelling a ton over the next week, we'll see him Friday night Saturday and Sunday and then pretty much not again until next Friday night.

We're off to see friends on Saturday and Sunday I'm doing somewhat of a mother's day do-over with my mom and going shopping and out for lunch. That might help restore some of my sanity???

It's keeping things interesting to say the least. We're coping with the year anniversary of the loss of our Mudpuppy and a close friend has a mother who is terminally ill with cancer and nearing her last days we fear. 

Its chaos in the friendliest form. It will all result in good things in the end, but grinding through the every day is not to be desired from time to time.

We did have fun taking our pup out to a pond for the first time. Wish I had a video of him getting spooked by his tail swishing under the water. Miss K attended her first school BBQ and already has her first t-shirt from the school.

There's silver linings to all the crap you go through, but it says something when you look forward to your day job as a rest from the outside of work job…

It is just 3 weeks plus a day until we take possession of the new place, hoping they fly by. I'm guessing if things keep up at the pace they are right now, we'll be packing all our crap back in boxes before we know it

Til next time…take some time to breathe and enjoy the small things...